Money, money, money, money

You can hear either the ABBA song or some other version of this word being sung.

Money is a major issue. I am not even going to go into personal finance issues. Here I am talking about synagogues.

Though I am not working as a congregational rabbi right now, I have major concerns about how synagogues will continue to function with the current economic reality in this country. No congregation that I know of can balance their budget on membership contributions (aka dues) alone. Current fundraising analyses show that American Jews are now not only giving to exclusively Jewish causes (nor should they). However (and I am badly summarizing here) many Jews are not giving to any Jewish causes or institutions. Instead they are donating to the ballet, the symphony or their alma mater. This is a major shift from fifty years ago. What are synagogues going to do short of boarding up the building with membership dues as they are?

My colleague, Rabbi Howard Jaffe offers a suggestion on the URJ blog.

Okay, it is not so modest. It may be a bit too ambitious. So how about this: can we at least rethink how we fund our synagogues?

We need a new financial model in North American Jewish life.

Once upon a time, Jews grew up, became young adults, almost always married other Jews, and within a few years, joined a synagogue. Whatever that synagogue asked for in dues, they paid (and did not see it as a contribution, but more of a Jewish tax).  No more.  Even so, the vast majority of our congregations still operate with models that were created in a different time, and reflect a different reality. Think about it: right now, if someone comes to one of our communities, we invite them in warmly, and ask them to commit to thousands of dollars per year to become part of a congregation with which they have yet to make a personal connection.

My synagogue is not unusual in relying on dues for the greatest part of our annual revenue. We are in good financial shape, and weathered the economic storm of recent years in large part thanks to two extraordinary well-timed gifts to our endowment. Our congregantship has increased over the past several years, and by most objective measures, we are thriving. And yet, in spite of the meaningful amount of interest that our endowment continues to yield, and in spite of our increased congregantship, our current financial model, the same one that is found in the vast majority of North American synagogue, is unsustainable.

Our congregation has a flat dues program, as opposed to a fair share or other somewhat less conventional model. And like most congregations, we are committed to the principle that no one will ever be turned away from congregantship because of genuine financial need. Beginning in 2008, when we first saw, as most congregations did, a sharp spike in the need for special arrangements, both the number of requests for such arrangements and the aggregate value of those arrangements have steadily increased.  While their numbers have been small, we have found, as have other congregations, that every year there are congregants who decide that the extent of their expected financial commitment to the Temple exceeds their sense of what is an appropriate annual contribution, and so, resign their congregantship.  Many of them are quite blunt about this it: they would continue to be congregants if they could do so for a smaller annual commitment.  There are congregations with flat dues that accommodate those requests, but most, including ours, do not.  The result of all of these factors is that, even with careful controls and financial discipline, the income we receive from dues as a percentage of our annual revenue is decreasing, requiring us to increase revenue from other sources or, over time, dramatically reduce our expenses, resulting in a different synagogue than we have today. We are neither small nor huge (about 820 households), and we pride ourselves on the extraordinary efforts and leadership provided by our congregants, but with a smaller staff than we currently have, and without financial resources to support our efforts (as it is, a very small percentage of our budget goes to support programming), we simply cannot continue as we are today.

We have decided, then, to embark on an unprecedented effort (in our community, at least) to increase the level of philanthropy within the congregation, in a combination of endowment and annual giving so as to, at the very least, slow the pace of dues increases, likely reduce the standard amount of dues that we ask congregants to contribute, and perhaps even reduce the threshold amount of “standard” dues so that finance is no longer a barrier to the participation of anyone, not only those who are unable to afford that “standard” amount.  Imagine how wonderful it would be to be able to welcome any newcomers to our community to participate in the lives of our congregations, and only later raising with them the matter of financial support!

My own experience has been that raising the level of philanthropy has been much easier than I ever imagined.  Ours is not especially affluent community, though admittedly, we have a few folks who have been able to make extraordinary gifts that have made a great difference.  Our efforts, however, are broad-based, as the vast majority of our congregants are able to contribute significantly more to the Temple on an annual basis than they currently do, but have never been asked.  We know from the experience of other organizations and institutions that rely on philanthropy that a compelling mission and a compelling story result in meaningful financial support.  As long as our mission and our story is compelling, we can experience the same results, and create a new model for a new time and a new reality.

Rabbi Howard Jaffe is the Senior rabbi at Temple Isaiah in Lexington, MA.

What are your thoughts on this? Can the synagogue model be sustained on dues? What about Rabbi Jaffe’s proposal? Do you belong to a synagogue?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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MY DAD, the veteran

MY DAD at Niagara Falls

This past Friday night we went to services to mark MY MOM’s English yahrtzeit (I will be marking the Hebrew date. More on that another time). One of the surprises of the service, besides the amazing experience of walking out of the service when I have to go to the bathroom and arriving as the opening song started, was when the veterans and parents of active duty soldiers were called to the bima. Silly me, I forgot that MY DAD served in the Army.

Ooops.

The officiating rabbi’s father was at the service, too. He said, “My name is Plony and I served these dates. And I’m better known as being the rabbi’s father.” MY DAD followed his cue and said, “My name is MY DAD and I served during xxxx-xxxx and my daughter is also a rabbi.” It was pretty adorable.

Way to go DAD!

___________________

Still writing for NaBloPoMo.

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One excruciating year

Tomorrow marks one year since MY MOM died (obviously I wasn’t going to post about it on Shabbat). It has been the most excruciating year for MY DAD and THE DIVA, too. This afternoon we unveiled the headstone of my mom’s grave. Thank you to all of those who have helped to support my family and I as we figure out life without MY MOM. After one year I can say that mostly what we realize is how lucky we are to have memories and pictures, a community of friend who are like family, family who we actually like to be around, and most of all each other.

The pain of MY MOM’s death will never go away. But every day I will try to focus on the wonderful memories and life lessons that I have learned the easy way and “the Ellie way.”

May MY MOM’s memory forever be for a blessing for all of those who knew her, and especially for MY DAD, THE DIVA, and I.

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Veteran’s Day

I found these poems online and find them to be an appropriate marker of Veteran’s Day.

Alden Solovy

Veterans Day Prayer

G-d of compassion,

G-d of dignity and strength,

Watch over the veterans of the United States

In recognition of their loyal service to our nation.

Bless them with wholeness and love.

Shelter them.

Heal their wounds,

Comfort their hearts.

Grant them peace.

G-d of justice and truth,

Rock of our lives,

Bless our veterans,

These men and women of courage and valor,

With a deep and abiding understanding

Of our profound gratitude.

Protect them and their families from loneliness and want.

Grant them lives of joy and bounty.

May their dedication and honor

Be remembered as a blessing

From generation to generation.

Blessed are You,

Protector and Redeemer,

Our Shield and our Stronghold.

To the Soldier, To the Veteran

These things I do not know:

The sound of a bullet.

The power of a blast.

The blood of a comrade.

The depth of your wound.

The terror at midnight.

The dread at dawn.

Your fear or your pain.

These things I know:

The sound of your honor.

The power of your courage.

The blood of your wound.

The depth of your strength.

The terror that binds you.

The dread that remains.

Your dignity and your valor.

For these things we pray:

The sound of your laughter.

The power of your voice.

The blood of your yearning.

The depth of your healing.

The joy that frees you.

The hope that remains.

Your wholeness and your love.

The Last Soldier

When the last soldier passes on,

When armies are disbanded and militias discharged,

When weapons are abandoned and armor discarded,

Your mission will, at last, be over.

For you know the soldier’s secret.

Yours was not a mission of war

Nor a mission of ruin.

Yours was not a mission of destruction

Nor a mission of death.

Your mission was safety, security, protection.

Your mission was honor, loyalty, service.

Your mission was to end violence, tyranny, despair.

When the last soldier passes on,

When the uniforms are retired and the final grave filled,

We will remember all who served and sacrificed for our nation.

Until then G-d of Old,

Watch over our soldiers and our veterans.

Renew their courage.

Rebuild their strength.

Heal their wounds.

Bind their hearts with Your steadfast love.

Remember them,

Bless then,

Sustain them,

And give them peace.

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I love my computer

A few days ago I had to take my computer to the Genius Bar at the Apple Store. There are some people who are very anti-Apple products. I respect their view, however, I have only had positive experiences with m Apple products. I was visiting about something about something different regarding my hard drive space and I mentioned another battery problem and through a surprising, quick decision, I walked out with a brand new battery. Thank you, Apple.

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The night of broken glass remembered

Today is the commemoration of Kristallnacht, the night of broken glass. It was November 9, 1938 in Nazi Germany and parts of Austria that synagogues, homes and businesses owned by Jews, and people were brutally destroyed.

Though Kristallnacht was 73 years ago. Today there is still so much hate in our world. What are you doing to fight hate in our world?

Yep, I’m still doing NaBloPoMo. 

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What is an unveiling

No one has actually asked me, however I am going to take this opportunity to teach you about the custom of unveiling a marker in the Jewish tradition.

Reprinted from myjewishlearning.com

Since ancient times, it has been the custom to mark the grave with a stone or monument. After Rachel died, “Jacob erected a monument on Rachel’s grave” (Genesis 35:20). The marker or monument serves to identify the grave so that relatives will find it when they visit, honor the memory of the deceased, and identify a place of burial…

Jewish tradition makes no stipulation as to the size or type of marker or monument, but most cemeteries have specific guidelines. The Jewish teaching that all are equal in death often serves as a guide to choosing an appropriate headstone.

The marker usually includes: the English and Hebrew name of the deceased, the dates of birth and death in English and Hebrew, and the relationship to other family members (i.e., father/mother, husband/wife, grandfather/grandmother, sister/ brother, etc.).

Unveiling

It is customary for the grave marker to be put in place and for an unveiling ceremony to be held after the Kaddish period [11 months for parents and 30 days for other close relatives] is over, but no later than one year after the death. While many families wait until almost the full year has passed to do the unveiling, it may be done sooner; in Israel the stone is usually placed soon after sheloshim [the first 30 days of mourning].Jewish headstone

It is customary, before leaving the gravesite, to place a small stone on the marker to indicate that someone has visited the grave. This tradition may also reflect the biblical practice of marking the grave with a pile of stones. Or, it may be the end result of the custom of writing notes to the deceased and pushing them into crevices in the headstone just as notes are pushed into the Western Wall in Jerusalem. When no crevice could be found, the note was weighted down with a stone. In time, the paper disintegrated or blew away leaving only the stone. Thus, some began to think that the leaving of a stone was the custom… and so it became the custom.

THE DIVA and I are leaving Thursday for the unveiling service. This weekend will also mark one year since MY MOM died (the date on the Jewish calendar was 5 Kislev and won’t happen for a few more weeks). As you can see from the somewhat lengthy description above, the unveiling is important mostly because I believe it is a part of the path acknowledging that life is different now and forever will be.

 

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Fancy nails

Today I took a little ‘me’ time and I got a mani/pedi. It is going to be a very emotional week (one year since MY MOM died, more on that later) so I was feeling a little bit silly. I noticed my nail place had the new muppet collection posted to the right. I was going to get the green glittery color (fresh frog of Bel Air) and I decided that was a bit too much. Instead I got the red sparkles (Gettin’ Miss Piggy with it) on my hands and a color called Pepe’s Purple Passion.

Awesome. I know.

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My iPad

Is where I writing this post from. And that’s about all I’ve got for NaBloPoMo today.

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It is raining

In Southern California. Yay! The weather has generally been quite pleasant this fall and the rain is a fantastic thing because it will help saturate the ground in order to prevent any forest fires. Hopefully it won’t rain all weekend long (Los Angelinos aren’t so great with the rain and then they get in my way. Yes I am a Los Angelina, however I lived for so many years in other climates that when it comes to weather, I do not get phased).

Just so you are aware, though it is NaBloPoMo, I will not be posting on Shabbat. See you on Sunday. Shabbat Shalom!

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